Around the world

Recently I was in the embassy in Nairobi Kenya. I was so proud of myself finally having completed my first trip around the world and so I was talking with the woman who supplies condoms to the world. And I said I traveled around the world and she asked how many times. Pop goes the bubble. Anyway this trip to Kenya was full of adventure. At first there was Rose, poor girl having been begging on the streets of Nairobi for food, well she found the big guy great feasting and after $20,000 I was just bones. So I then started out with the twins, I love twins, to see one person finish the others sentence. Well after 3 cows 2 goats and brown envelops and a thousand lies I walked out the door to never return. I had a beautiful computer high speed internet and was prisoner inside the house. So after receiving death threats, real or imagined I don't know I took off to Nairobi in a jet plane with my two new accomplices. I love to see people take there first plane ride. Anyway the trip from Kisumu to Nairobi one half hour, the trip from Nairobi airport to downtown an hour and a half. The trip to the Kisumu airport was made a speeds unbelievable and any movie crew would have died to film it. And after arriving the car rose in a billow of steam and we rushed inside to check in as we were very late. The twins were fascinating as they took turns listening and voicing fears that Rose was just about to kill them. Well since they were so nervous I said lets go to Nanyuki, a small town at the base of Mount Kenya. After 5 hours and $125.00 in taxi fare we arrived. We looked for a cheap hotel all of which were not acceptable and we arrived at the sportsman club. Very nice an impossibly expensive by Kenyan standards at $120, the rooms(suite) were very nice but the food very bad. I have no clothes so we head down to the newly opened Nakumart to get me another pair of shorts and shirt. We spent a pleasant day there I had bought each of the girls a new cell phone and one camera. On the trip I brought one cell phone and bout 6 others. Still afraid for there lives we head across country to Nakuru. The road almost disappeared and we were practically traveling through pasture. I rode up from but the twins were packed in back like sardines. Finally after traversing beautiful rural Kenya we arrived at Nyahururu for a brief stop. I am sure the wild west was like this. The Matatus have what they call stations and as many as a hundred will be stopped there waiting for the trip to there destination. Finally we turned a corner a below us was the vast valley where Nakuru is. I can truly say Africa is most beautiful and the poverty we hear about does not show. It is there but the majority are not poor but not rich either but as in all places in the world there are the rich in there Humvee and obviousness to life. Well the twins are off to Kisumu and they leave me alone at the Pilot Hotel. In the hotel was one of the last discos on earth and I enjoyed myself thoroughly and drank apple bear with my two companions. After a lot of beer we retired to my room just the two of us and we had a pleasant night in each others arms. I was prepared for a lonely night alone my first in 3 months but fate had provided me with a companion and I was so grateful. In my whole time in Kenya I never slept alone. My maid when I was with Rose gave me my bath and every once in a while she stole a Kiss. Sorry there was two nighta I slept alone that was when I got married Luo style(go figure). Anyway back to Nakuru I took a Taxi from Nakuru to Kisumu in the morning and went straight to my next wife Zainabu a hair stylist. We set up house together and I had a great time until I learned she had a husband in town. SO once again I take of with my small carry on bag and head to my new wife. Since she may be in danger I will not mention her name. But she takes me to her home area where I spend the next 3 weeks relieving my childhood ie no electricity or running water. Anyway I ask if I could have a co wife and she agrees as it is common practice there in her clan. Each clan has there own rules and when they don't want to do something they will on the spot make up a rule. So instead of cows this time I give money to bring electricity to the house. Now let me explain Kenyan women are kind and gracious to a fault but the truth is always a country away. They lie with creative abandon. I think of them as small children trying to please u by making up stories. They are all different but at the core they are African women yet to be introduced into the world as full citizens. They are trying but I remember the 2 year old cleaning the stool with her underpants. They are trained to serve. And they create there own little society in the kitchens so poor u want to cry. But they are sisters and they support each other in there happy misery because they know not what other women of the world enjoy. I love African women with them I feel loved and treasured and anyone of them would run away with me at a moments notice. Because to be the wife of a white man is a status above all the rest. Now don't get me wrong just because the color of my skin is white makes me no better than anyone else but you can't convince 80% of African women this, so I just relax and enjoy my good fortune.
And so sleeping between my two wives in the Nairobi hotel I smile and exclaim wow this is truly amazing.